Your mind is a thought machine. Your emotions are its support system. They work together to create action. And yet, no matter what you’ve thought in the past or even uttered, the phrase and thought pattern of “It is what it is” is both flat wrong and oddly true, all at the same time!

“It is what it is” discounts the fact that your brain is not preset upon arrival, and every time you do something new, your brain shifts and changes. When we witness these changes, our most significant gains are created.

Before we dive into the question that inspired this mindset reset, I must use the power of pause and celebrate to say thank you! This conversation marks the 200th episode here on the podcast. I cannot thank you enough for listening and being a valuable part of this community. It means the world to me and those who work to bring you weekly conversations and ways to move forward in your life.

Now, let’s get to it. Bonnie from Seattle, Washington, wrote, "Danielle, I am hoping you can help me. My partner and I were having a conversation about not being where we want to be just yet. He has a different mindset than I do. He is much more relaxed and I am much more focused on getting to the next level. He says I’m missing the journey. I say that cliché. Is it really that important to celebrate the small stuff? I know you talk about being present, intentional, and mindful, but does all that stuff really make a difference? I think I’m asking you to convince me I’m right and he is wrong. Is that bad?”

Bonnie, great question. And I hate to tell you this, but he’s right.  

Let’s talk about why he is right and open the mind to celebrating every small victory, no matter how small.

The truth is your brain loves reward! It’s wired for reward. And yet, it also has a default that is built in to remember more negatives than positives. It’s called a negativity bias. Why do we have this? To help us remain safe in all situations.

With both a reward system that needs to be activated and a negative bias—remembering the positives takes extra effort.

“It is what it is,” see what I’m saying.

When you do something, big or small, and you celebrate the hell out of it, the brain literally eats it up! It fires off feel-good chemicals – dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and endorphins. It’s that explosion of happiness we feel. When that happens, it also lowers damaging cortisol levels and calms the brain's amygdala.

Let’s talk about why he is right and open the mind to celebrating every small victory, no matter how small.

The truth is your brain loves reward! It’s wired for reward. And yet, it also has a default that is built in to remember more negatives than positives. It’s called a negativity bias. Why do we have this? To help us remain safe in all situations.

With both a reward system that needs to be activated and a negative bias—remembering the positives takes extra effort.

“It is what it is,” see what I’m saying.

When you do something, big or small, and you celebrate the hell out of it, the brain literally eats it up! It fires off feel-good chemicals – dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and endorphins. It’s that explosion of happiness we feel, and all of that only happens when we are in a moment of sensing our good work, where we are, the moment, you get it, the things that are the victory.

When that happens, it also lowers damaging cortisol levels and calms the brain's amygdala.

When we celebrate, we reinforce safety, and provide the brain evidence that feeling good is good for the entire self.

Listen to the rest of this mindset reset to learn the #1 BRAIN HACK for feeling the reward celebration

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