Epi 42: How to Discover Your Love Language?
Do you know what love language you speak?
Do you know how you like to have your needs, emotional connectivity, and love style met?
Many understand that there is an unwritten communication of receiving, giving, and feeling love, but often how we express and expect love in return is lost in translation. This week, we’re breaking down the importance of love languages, the different types, recognizing your partner’s language, and we’ll connect the dots to asking for more when we’re not on the same page with our partners. Ultimately, if we understand our love language, we can strengthen all forms of communication, which results in happier, healthy, and far more grounded and productive relationships.
So, let’s dive in and shift our perspectives to form emotionally intelligent relationships.
Key Takeaways:
00:00 Introduction
01:43 Introducing the theory of Love Languages and their importance
03:50 How your love languages were developed
05:09 You are a meaning-making machine, and how this dramatically impacts your love languages
06:58 A new approach to the 5 Love Languages and a WARNING!
09:53 Love Language #1: Words of Affirmations
Words of Affirmation are positive and affirming words that build us up and encourage our spirit. Verbal compliments and words of praise are powerful communicators of love that have tremendous power to build relationships.
13:06 How Words of Affirmations are often confused with Validation. The two are not interchangeable.
15:14 Questions to ask yourself to discover if this is your love language
22:00 Love Language #2: Acts of Service
Acts of Service come down to a non-verbal form of communication and love shown through doing and time. To go deeper, what is appreciated is the effort someone gives.
23:02 How to identify if this is your love language
24:53 The questions to ask yourself to uncover your connection to Acts of Service
25:25 Tools to use in this language style
Pay attention to the small things
Pay attention to routines
Consider schedules and shared duties
27:31 Love Language #3: Receiving Gifts
This is an act of receiving, not materialism. Receiving gifts as a language comes down to sentimentality, being thought of.
29:43 How to know if language #3 is how you want your emotional and connectivity needs to be met
31:41 How to ask for your needs to be met by your spouse or partner
33:35 Love Language #4: Quality Time
This language centers around togetherness and true connectivity
34:54 The efforts of creating harmony between quality time and how it is felt by someone who thrives on language #4
38:49 Love Language #5: Physical Touch
This language goes beyond sexual intimacy. It’s about affection and feeling physically connected.
40:29 Ways to engage with language five when it isn’t your primary language, or it makes you uncomfortable
41:24 Answering the question if it’s possible to speak and operate through multiple language styles
42:07 What happens when our languages conflict, and how to create alignment with one another
Learn your partner’s style
Compromise
Never expect someone’s language to change to have your needs met
44:00 How the love language understanding helps your relationships grow—even the relationship with yourself
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