Habits are important. They are important as they really do serve us in the long run. A habit is an action we've practiced into a routine, and it's important to know that your mind works in patterns. When we practice something enough times, our mind locks it into place. Your thoughts become beliefs. Your beliefs become actions. Your actions become habits, and that's all well and good until it doesn't work for you.

Emotionally sound people are deliberate about how they appear in the world. They understand their belief system and their core values. Understanding your value and belief system is so essential that you cannot become emotionally resilient without it. That’s why you and I are taking a one-on-one deep dive into understanding your emotions and values. Then, I’m handing over the inner conversation people with emotional resiliency tell themselves in moments of hardship. This internal dialogue is so important that it can change how you look at life. Let’s not waste another moment and dive right in.

Welcome to Pause & Affirm! This quick, upbeat hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace! This quick hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace!

TAKE A MOMENT TO RELAX AND ALLOW THESE WORDS TO SETTLE IN YOUR MIND, HEART, AND SOUL.

Welcome to this seated mindfulness meditation. This practice guides you into a deeper state of relaxation in your mind and body while allowing your mind to slow down and create a sense of calm by reducing that inner chatter.

Trauma, dysregulated emotions, high levels of stress and anxiety, all have a way of rewiring and changing your nervous system. The changes are so significant they can cause disease as you witness and carry your dis-ease; they cause coping mechanisms and self-harm, and a host of other significant life impacts. Yet, there is a way to retrain the autonomic nervous system and your relationship to your experiences.

I sat down with trauma and addiction therapist, Polyvagal Institute Course Developer, teacher, and author Jan Winhall to talk about how to shift out of flight/fight/fold and freeze, and how we can connect with ourselves and change and get out of the impending danger we feel that keeps us from relaxing and enjoying our lives.

Welcome to Pause & Affirm! This quick, upbeat hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace! This quick hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace!

TAKE A MOMENT TO RELAX AND ALLOW THESE WORDS TO SETTLE IN YOUR MIND, HEART, AND SOUL.

Sadly, we now live in a world where being offended by even the littlest thing is a standard. Yet, by not getting offended so quickly, you minimize your stress levels and open yourself up to new ideas, thought processes, emotions, and experiences.

Bella Jean from Portland, Oregon, wrote in and said: “Danielle, I have been working on growing and becoming a better person over the last year, but there’s something that I can’t quite grow out of yet. That’s not taking offense when someone questions my thoughts or feelings or when my family tells me I’m wrong because they haven’t done all the work on themselves that I have done. It’s tiring, and I want to let things slide off my shoulders, but I don’t know how. Can you help?”

When was the last time you listened to your inner conversation? Is it serving you, or does it take you down? Most women struggle with their inner critic and tend to beat themselves up. Is this you? If so, there’s one essential life practice that can silence the inner critic, help you release the need to trash yourself and your worth, and is the ultimate foundation of self-love.

What is it? It’s self-empathy.

While you may be familiar with having empathy for others, turning this practice inward changes the inner conversation and opens the door to cultivating inner peace, happiness, and gives you the courage to be the woman who loves themselves fiercely.

Welcome to Pause & Affirm! This quick, upbeat hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace! This quick hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace!

TAKE A MOMENT TO RELAX AND ALLOW THESE WORDS TO SETTLE IN YOUR MIND, HEART, AND SOUL.

Find a comfortable position and take a deep breath. Now, close your eyes and allow your thoughts to soften. Bring your mind to a state of stillness and focus on two beautiful words. Those words are peace and Shanti. Shanti is a Sanskrit term that can be loosely translated as “peace be with you.” It’s a reminder that peace is always within your grasp.

Because being at peace is a choice. A daily choice that reminds us that we are on a journey—a journey of learning, of lessons and redirection, a journey of creating balance and deep inner understanding, and a journey that has always been meant to guide us to the humble state in which we arrived, in peace and embodying Shanti.

What does the term “coping mechanisms” mean to you? The term has taken on an understanding that doesn’t fully explain a coping mechanism or how it can take you into dark places in your life. After all, they are more than just the things you do because at the base of every coping mechanism is a hope that you have a sense of safety and control, even if it isn’t a true security blanket.

When we use our coping mechanisms against ourselves, we create less than fulfilling lives. This is especially true if your coping mechanism is something that requires work. An example of that work is emotional eating.

While many of us do not look at our eating habits and relationship with food as disordered, it can be without even realizing it. Any disordered habits create disordered thinking, which upsets our emotional balance. That’s why I sat down with the founder and leader of Escape From Emotional Eating Jessica Procini to talk about the root of this coping mechanism and how to tackle it if this is a struggle for you. Jessica even hands over a priceless tool you can use right now!

Welcome to Pause & Affirm! This quick, upbeat hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace! This quick hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace!

TAKE A MOMENT TO RELAX AND ALLOW THESE WORDS TO SETTLE IN YOUR MIND, HEART, AND SOUL.

Let’s face it; relationships can be hard. This is especially true when we are talking about long-term, romantic relationships. When we know our partners intimately, we often tend to forecast or assume we know what they are thinking, how they will respond, what they need, want, like, you get it, all the things. Yet, that assumption or lack of discovery questions is where we first trip up and cause our own problems.

Davida from Puerto Rico wrote, “Danielle, I’ve been married for twenty-one years. We love and respect one another. However, I’ve noticed in the last two years that our communication has changed. We both have grown so much individually and within our marriage. We both consider our marriage to be solid, but we’ve begun to notice minor disagreements on things like doing the dishes or what time our oldest child has to be home are turning into bigger issues than they should be. Is there something we can do to help guide one another through these moments? I find myself mad at him and want him to respond differently. He becomes mad at me. Sometimes we talk it out. Sometimes it sits and waits for a few days. It’s not a healthy cycle. What do you suggest?”

You’ve probably heard the saying, “Control is an illusion.” And for all points and purposes, it absolutely is. It is also one of the greatest paradoxes we experience in life. We are to be in control, but not try to control every situation, while finding a sense of control to keep ourselves safe. It’s no wonder we screw this up and use control in ways that often negatively impact us.

That’s why you and I are taking a one-on-one deep dive into control. We’ll take a journey into the three root causes of control, and we’ll talk about repairing your relationship with specific outcomes, no matter what situations you may be facing. By the end of this conversation, you’ll have a new understanding of why the art of surrendering is so damn important!

So, let’s dive right in!

Welcome to Pause & Affirm! This quick, upbeat hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace! This quick hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace!

TAKE A MOMENT TO RELAX AND ALLOW THESE WORDS TO SETTLE IN YOUR MIND, HEART, AND SOUL.

Welcome to this guided, active relaxation meditation to welcome in silence and to give yourself permission to sit in what you need and want right now.  

Many struggle with letting go and finding silence. Its boundlessness feels too expansive to explore, too quiet to sit in, while we fight against what may come up—the thoughts, the feelings, the unknown, and the known.

And yet, in meditation, silence is what we are seeking. Emotional release is the benefit of silence. It’s turning off the machine of the brain and allowing your consciousness to rise.

Your brain operates in patterns and does just as it’s told by its director—you. You arrived on this earth with minimal preset programming. But your soul knows its direction, purpose, and intention. You find it in the silence, active release, and relaxation.

One of the best things we can do for ourselves is dig deep and uncover why we do what we do. This work is an intentional act that takes getting to know yourself, releasing connections to things that do not serve us, and choosing the energy and practices we want to grow through. An unhealed life often feels like an overwhelming sense of danger, powerlessness, and fear. Healing creates safety and empowers self-authority.

And yet, the question always is: how do we get there?

I sat down with Dr. Jane Tornatore to talk about the “how.” She and I share our best-used tools for healing in a fantastic conversation that will leave you with many starting points and excellent practices and tools you can try right now to create or move you forward in your journey.

Grab a pen and a piece of paper! You’re going to need it!

Welcome to Pause & Affirm! This quick, upbeat hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace! This quick hit of inspiration is meant to remind you of your greatness, inner light, and peace!

TAKE A MOMENT TO RELAX AND ALLOW THESE WORDS TO SETTLE IN YOUR MIND, HEART, AND SOUL.

Your mind is a thought machine. Your emotions are its support system. They work together to create action. And yet, no matter what you’ve thought in the past or even uttered, the phrase and thought pattern of “It is what it is” is both flat wrong and oddly true, all at the same time!

Now, let’s get to it. Bonnie from Seattle, Washington, wrote, "Danielle, I am hoping you can help me. My partner and I were having a conversation about not being where we want to be just yet. He has a different mindset than I do. He is much more relaxed and I am much more focused on getting to the next level. He says I’m missing the journey. I say that cliché. Is it really that important to celebrate the small stuff? I know you talk about being present, intentional, and mindful, but does all that stuff really make a difference? I think I’m asking you to convince me I’m right and he is wrong. Is that bad?”

What you carry, you must pay for in one way or another. That’s true whether it’s actual financial debt, physical debt of not respecting your body, mental debt from not thinking thoughts that serve you, or emotional debt from suppressing your emotions. We talk so much about trauma and impactful events, but what we often truly fail to address is how the debt, the weight, shows up in our lives as a symptom to something greater.

That’s why you and I are taking a one-on-one deep dive into emotional debt, what it is, and then we’ll examine one of the most significant symptoms we feel—feeling disconnected.

If you ever feel emotionally exhausted, weighted down by the stories in your head, or feeling disconnected, you are not alone, but this is the conversation for you.